So I’m to the part in the Old Testament, where the Lord has performed so many miracles for the children of Israel, and yet they doubt so easily that the Lord will keep His promises to them. He freed them from the slavery of Egypt, parts the Red Sea, AND makes the ground dry, so they cross on dry ground, not mud. When they are hungry and with no food or water, in the desert, He sends food, in the form of Manna each day, except Sunday, and provides water from a rock. The Lord promised them He would deliver them and lead them to a promised land, and does exactly that, time after time after time.
Now they are at the foot of Mount Sinai, and the Lord has given them commandments to follow, and they promise to obey and keep Gods commandments, they don’t just promise, they covenant, through a sacrifice, by Moses, that they will be true to the Lord.
They see the glory of God on the Mountain for 40 days and nights, while Moses is up on the mountain getting further instructions from God, a higher law.
Even as they can see the fire on the mountain, representing Gods Glory, they doubt. After 40 days and nights, they decide they don’t know what happened to there leader, Moses, Gods prophet, and melt down some of the gold they brought from Egypt, which by the way, was supposed to be for a Temple to God, and they make themselves a Golden Calf to worship.
When things got tough, they either forgot to look at the mountain and remember that Moses and God were talking up there, Face to Face, or they had got so use to the sight, it didn’t mean anything to them anymore and they chose to doubt God. They went back to there old ways, they decided it was better to worship a cold hard object, that could do NOTHING for them, instead of hold on to there Faith in God( I mean seriously, He had not failed them yet, they had absolutely no reason to doubt), and wait for there Prophet to return with further blessings and instructions. Because Gods timeline, did not fit there timeline, they chose to forget that God who had saved and taken care of them time after time after time.
As I pondered this, I thought of my own life, especially the last 18 months. Did I do the same thing, in a sense? Did I doubt God, when things got hard? I did, for a little while. I thought God had forgotten me, I wasn’t as diligent about keeping on doing all those little things, that have always kept me strong. I wasn’t has diligent in my prayers, in reading my scriptures each day, actually studying them, when I went to church, I didn’t even try to feel the Spirit, while I was there. And when it went on for more then a year, with no relief or apologies from those that had hurt me, and no church callings came, I truly thought I had been forgotten, by the leadership in our ward, by some friends and by God, and it hurt.
Because Gods timeline wasn’t my timeline, I missed out for so long on blessings He wanted to send me, but couldn’t because I had turned away from Him. When I finally turned back, He taught me so much, He helped me forgive, He helped me realize MY responsibility in doing all that I need to to stay close to Him, so His Spirit can always be with me. His ways are ALWAYS better, higher then my ways, and as I wait, patiently now, for His timing, He teaches me and blesses me each day. I love Him, I’m so grateful that He NEVER deserted me, but was ALWAYS just waiting for me to turn back, so He could help and deliver me.
Those little things, praying sincerely, with real intent, studying my scriptures and the words of His prophets each day, serving others, going to the Temple. Those things matter so much, they keep us on the covenant path back to Him, and help us wait patiently on Him, when there are storms along the way.
